I remember Sadashiva as the sweetest intimate Guru who happened in My life as Arunagiri Yogishwara. The only name that can put blushing on My face is Arunagiri Yogishwara. Even the name Sadashiva puts Gambhira on My face, but Arunagiri Yogishwara will put blushing on My face.
Millions of explanations, meanings, and definitions for Guru exist. But let Me tell you – best Guru, ultimate Guru, Sadashiva himself, when He happened in My life as Arunagiri Yogishwara, what I experienced with Him, how He defined himself, how He held himself, how He conducted himself, let Me define, I think that is My message for all of you today.
Verbally He was always ferocious, demanding, expecting Me to stand up to His expectation, anyakara. In reality absolutely comfortable and never bothers, never cares, and never even remembers the verbal instruction He gave; the way His body language, the way His life, the way He holds in His inner space. Understand, I have given a very… [laughs] important sacred secret of Guru-disciple relationship which forms the fundamental, foundational, first principle of Sanatana Hindu Dharma.
Understand, the primary, fundamental, foundational first principle of Sanatana Hindu Dharma is the Guru-Disciple relationship. Everything starts there, everything ends there. Everything starts there, everything ends there, but this itself does not end. In the Guru-Disciple relationship, everything starts there, and everything ends there, but the relationship itself never ends. I have given you the most important sacred secret to have that relationship in the best way.
He was always demanding verbally, expecting Me to stand up to His expectation, anyakara. But when it comes to reality, the way He relates with me, I never expected anything. It was always accepting Me not only as I was growing or budding or happening, the way He held Me, the way he carried Me in life.
Understand, the difference between these two – verbally when He is talking when He is relating with words, I have never seen Him compromising. In actual life, I have never seen Him demanding. It was such a paradox. When I understood this secret – His ferocious strong words and teaching and His compassionate, all-encompassing hug and lifestyle reality, when I understood both points where they are merging, where they are meeting – I started having the same smugness My disciples have when I am firing at them.
Understand, here I will be literally screaming at the decibel of Surya-Chandra; the fellow is standing there and coolly romancing the way My eyebrows are going up and down, My lips moving right-left. That is precisely the secret I got from Him. Understand, His state is never demanding, His space is always raising. His state is all-acceptance, His space always raising. A unique paradoxical truth… if you realize this truth you will have the best relationship of your Being – Guru-Disciple relationship.
In Tamil there is a proverb – with mother, the best food will disappear in your life means if your mother is gone, the best food is gone. All of you need to know whether your mother is the best cook or not does not matter; because you ate from her first, your tongue cherishes only your mother’s cooking, as the best food in its muscle memory and bio memory. So,
With the death of the mother, the best food is gone,
With the death of the father, education is gone.
With the death of a friend, the shoulder to care for you is gone.
The description goes…
With the death of the son, your future ambitions for the world, your vision, is gone.
With the death of the wife, everything is gone. Understand, in old age, the only thing a man should not miss is a chaste wife’s nearness. The whole thing is described.
But the ultimate, final, last word I wanted to add missing the Guru, of course, I can’t use the word – the death of the Guru because the Guru never dies. Missing the Guru’s Physical Presence, after that, nothing else is there for you to lose.
I don’t even want to say it is depression. There is nothing to lose if you miss the physical nearness presence of the Guru, the best relationship for life.
Understand, the relationship of the mother adds some component to you, the relationship of the father adds some component to you, the relationship of the teacher adds some component to you, the relationship of the friend adds some component to you, the relationship of the beloved adds some component to you. Each relationship adds something to you. Even the relationship with the enemy adds some component to you; the intelligence to defend you is added. Understand, Gambhira is put in your body language by your enemies. Even the relationship with the enemy adds something to you.
The Guru-Disciple relationship adds You to you. That adds You to you.
Today I will just try to explain as it is; uncensored, unedited, My relationship with My Guru Arunagiri Yogishwara.; why it evolved, flowered, blossomed, and finally the ultimate Oneness happened. If I remember I can give you 100 points. Even the beauty, the grace of His hair, even all those things are one-one points. The way He will talk to Me without words, just by body language. There will be such deafening sounds; especially in the noon times when there is a gap in the temple. The temple, usually, the majority of the time I spend with Him is only in the temple. Noon there will not be any puja. There will be a break. In Agamic tradition after the uchi kala puja till sayarakshai there is a gap. Neither the public will be allowed to come and go, nor the rituals will be happening. So no sounds; no bell sound, no music sound, no nadaswaram, nothing. Those moments were literally the deafening silence of the stone walls of the temple. Only that ooooozzzzz, the wind sound moves through the coconut trees all around and hits the stone wall of the temple. When I am sitting, gazing, drinking literally His beauty and grace. I don’t even want to use the decent words – raw, let Me use very raw words – the way He appears and looks and shape and size. When I am just drinking His glory and His very Presence… very light, very heavy.
If you see Him, He appears as such a light being. Many times I will have a doubt whether He has a bone and flesh inside His skin; it will be so graceful. But the way He impacts impresses My Being – so heavy!! He knows even a few words can disturb the way I am enjoying Him so without even uttering the words and disturbing the deafening silence, just through the body language and the eyes, the way He will communicate – with no words or minimal words – even all those things I can give as a reason why the Guru–Disciple relationship in My life has flowered into the ultimate Oneness. But if I get the essence – three reasons.
First thing I will tell you – I understood the paradox – in His state He is all-encompassing, loving, never demanding. He knows He is responsible by His very existence, for Me to become one with Him. His interest in Me becoming one with Him is much more than My interest in becoming one with Him. His passion for Me is 1000 times more than My passion for Him. My passion is Kanta, his passion is Akhanta. My need is kanta, His need is akhanta. By His very state, understand, by His very state of appearing from Kailasa, He has already made a clear statement – I am here, naturally I have to be successful. I am here for You to realize Oneness and naturally, I have to be successful. He has already declared, His akhanda, undivided love for Me. His very appearance in My life and letting Me realize who He is, through this He has already made the statement – I am here for You, and I will naturally make You experience the oneness.
So his passion for Me is 1000s of times more than My passion for Him. He has come from all the way from Kailasa to here, I have come just from the next street to here. At every level He has made a statement through His existence, His feeling for Me, passion for Me, is 1000s of times more than Mine for Him. I understood by the existence He is committed, non-demanding. But all His words, the way He operates… the way He tries to show His mask…. sometimes just to enjoy that I used to tease Him. That same thing is coming back to Me.
Whatever I did to Arunagiri Yogishwara is coming back to me. Whether I call it good or bad… life is life, karma is karma. Whatever I did to Him is coming back to Me. And if any of you feel that you are disturbing Me or I am kolumbyfying to you be very clear and complete, I am getting what I did to Arunagiri Yogishwara. It is a once for all final, ultimate, declaration. I am only getting what I did to Him; that’s all. And it has nothing to do with your worthiness or qualification, right, wrong. It is not your karma, it is My karma. Be complete about it and be clear about it. So this issue is solved once and for all. Use this as a essence of today’s Satsang, message.
I understood this secret at the cognition level. Otherwise, it is impossible to hold, and withstand, somebody like Him entering into the Being. Understand, it’s literally like an elephant entering into the hut. Even when He appears in front of me, the whole nervous system will be like a turning; the whole Being is being opened. It will not be like some person is standing in front of you. You just know somebody is entering into you. See, when He sits it will appear like whether He has bones and flesh inside His skin. But the way He impacts Me I will feel whether I have bones and flesh in My body; the way He enters into the system. You cannot hold that kind of a personality unless you know the secret – in His Being, He is a good guy. In His Being, He is a good guy.
That secret cognition – it was not logical understanding for Me so I need to remind myself; maybe within 3-4 days, it clicked already. It’s not that all His demanding through His teachings I did not stand up, but I know for sure even if I don’t stand up and fall, I will be falling into His inner space which is non-demanding and always healing. I will not be falling on the stone floor, I will be falling in His lap. ‘The ground below Me is His lap’ gave Me the courage to jump the heights that I never imagined. It gave Me the courage to high jump or long jump. Understand, when I realized if I fell, I was going to be falling only in His lap, gave Me the guts. He will act as if His lap is not there anymore. Sometimes He will even wait for Me to fall, but I know for sure I am not going to touch the stone or the ground. It is always going to be His lap; because in His existence, He is non-demanding.
His eyes will rotate big-big; very big eyes – “ehh do this do that, hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm.” But the center of the eye, that sweet innocence even He was not able to hide. I will be sitting and enjoying only that center of the eyes.
Payapullaiga, nan enna panninaeno athayae ennaku pannuthunga
The first secret I understood – in His space, in His state, He is non-demanding thoroughly committed; he is committed to Me, so I have to make it, I will make it, I cannot fail. Fish can jump right, left, up, down, and kick the ocean water as much as it want but finally, it will be in the ocean water. That tremendous completion in cognition empowered me to take the jump. Understand, to stand up to an ordinary person’s expectation itself you need that ordinary person’s love. But to stand up to Sadashiva’s expectation only by His love, you can have it, you can do it
Cognition of confirmation of His love is the secret principle of Guru-disciple relationship. Sometimes when I feel thoroughly that He is upset with Me and I am not going to see Him anymore, He may not be talking to Me or coming to Me anymore, when I slowly walk putting My head down outside the temple, the Nandi in the center will hit me, ehhh go back, He told me…. J
His Nandi knows, and Nandi reveals the truth – the fundamental foundation is love. Many of My Nandis know the fundamental foundation is love. That tremendous feeling empowered, the very act of introducing Himself and letting Me catch Him, cognize Him, is the completion of His acceptance.
Once you date, you cannot reject – the Hindu tradition. Even if you go and eat in the bride or bridegroom’s house, once you eat you can’t cancel the marriage. That is why they will say that only after talking, we will decide whether to eat or not. Traditional Hinduism even if you eat in the other house you can’t cancel the marriage.
And He is the embodiment of Hinduism. After giving a statement, letting Him realize who He is – no question of rejecting; rejection does not exist. And He knows Me more than I know Him. He knows me, My possibility to win or lose, My possibility of this side or that side much more than I know Him. With all that clarity He introduced himself, He let Me recognize him; that’s all, over. That tremendous relief empowered Me to stand up to His expectations. It empowered Me to break the dictations of chemicals and hormones in My own body. Understand, no chemical could create tiredness, no hormone can create ups and downs in My system; even that was conquered by the way He empowered Me by His love. I know what is the meaning of getting choked!!!
The fundamental principle of Sanatana Hindu Dharma is the Guru-Disciple relationship. And fundamental, primary secret to make it successful; what is the success of the Guru-Disciple relationship? You realize the Oneness with Sadashivatva, you realize the ultimate. That is the success of the Guru-Disciple relationship; that is the purpose. The fundamental primary secret, raja vidya, raja guhyam, royal knowledge, and the royal secret is, to make the Guru-Disciple relationship successful is realizing – by His state, He is compassionate, all-encompassing, all-committed, and non-demanding.
He is more responsible than you. He is more passionate than you. He wants you to realize Oneness more than you want to realize Oneness. His quantity and qualities of the opened eyes are more than your quantity and quality of the eyes. Yours is two, his is plural. In Sanskrit, two is not plural. In Sanskrit three – one, two, and then plural; only in English one and plural. For you two eyes, even in that the quality… can’t be said 100%. His more than two, is plural, and the quality is absolute. Understand, this empowered Me, empowered Me with such strength.
If you feel you are hearing the right words which you need to hear now, this is for you. “God, this is what I need to hear, and I heard it.” “This is what I was waiting to hear, aoooffff.” “I am torturing you na, because you tortured. What can I do?” J
Varumpadi sollinai vanthu en padi ala
It’s a very sweet dialogue between Sadashiva and Ramana Maharishi. Ramana Maharishi says, “You called me, I came. Now come on, come and do what needs to be done.”
His Integrity is a million times more than My Integrity.
His Responsibility is a billion times more than My Responsibility.
His Authenticity is a trillion times more than My Authenticity.
His Enriching is a zillion times more than My Enriching.
That gave Me the Restful Awareness. That empowered me. That empowered My very core. That empowered Me to jump.
Understand, otherwise, it is impossible to cooperate with Him, especially with the whole Being. See when He holds My hand and takes Me into His cave, it is literally a death process!! Like, He will pull Me out of the body. Like how the snakes leave the skin and go that is exactly the way He will pull. Even if you have one thought current of fear He will not be able to pull, He will say, “Rest; we will see tomorrow.” I was able to just go with Him without even having one thought current of fear when He pulled Me and walked because I was empowered with the cognition – He is a good guy. Aye, He is compassion and love – The fundamental secret of making the Guru-Disciple relationship successful
The second important thing I have, is the vatavarna, ambiance – listen, there cannot be a Guru-Disciple relationship without you having some incompletion; especially His space is… understand, His state is highly committed and non-demanding. His space, means, the way He acts, and His words will all be highly demanding. He will just say, “ehhh sit, come on levitate.” No technique, no initiation. He will say, “Raise, pull your body up.” His demand is literally like sucking the life out of the body. I was able to stand up to His demand because of My cognition which He gave – love.
Understand, the depth of your cognition of My state that I am love and compassionate, only will be your strength to stand up to My demand and expectation. If you are not standing up, the problem is your cognition about Me. Look there. Look there.
So naturally when He is demanding, and I am trying to stand up, there will be something so-called incompletion; because… He is not even giving a technique or initiation and asking Me to meditate and raise. He is just telling Jump, what is this? Unfair! This “unfair”!!! But fortunately, I had amazing people with whom I could crib, and never they divert Me out of him. Understand, your destruction is not My high demanding… the wrong person to whom you crib. I was fortunate to have highly complete beings to whom I can crib and they always put Me back to completion. Understand when you are cribbing you are vulnerable to poison or nectar, you are open to nectar or poison. To whom you crib, you eat his ….. (silence (laughs… hhmmm ) To whom you crib you eat his… shhhhhh.
Understand, the second important reason why My relationship with My Guru was successful… when He was demanding, literally opening Me up; understand the seed needs to open for the sprout to happen. When He was demanding, all His demands were illogical because His love was illogical. The way He empowered Me was illogical. His acceptance of Me was illogical. So His demands were illogical. If you have to become extraordinary, you have to be performing extraordinary. His empowering Me was extraordinary, illogical and His demand to Me was illogical. The way He empowered me… overflowing. The way He was sucking My life out of Me by His demand is overpowering, overwhelming. At the same time, I was empowered by His support, and I was overwhelmed by His demand.
The most fortunate thing I had was vatavarana, ambiance, and atmosphere. The people with whom I cribbed pushed Me back to My Guru and integrity to Guru. They were always pouring and supporting and put Me back to My Guru; they did not support My powerless side. Understand, having a friend who will always put you back to integrity to Guru is having your version of Guru with you. He is atma bandhu, soul mate. You are blessed. If you have a spouse who puts you back to the integrity of the Guru, I tell you, you are 1000 times better than any Sannyasi. You are a billion times better than any sannyasi. You are empowered a zillion times by Sadashiva. If you have a spouse who puts you back to integrity to Guru, I tell you, you have Guru as your beloved. You literally have your Guru as your beloved. The vatavarana – ambiance, person to whom you crib when you are demanded, overwhelmed by the Guru and His anyakara, His expectation.
Unimaginable innocence and unimaginable understanding put together is My mother. She all single-handedly provided Me the vatavarna to whom I can crib and will never support My powerlessness. This Raghupati Yogi will torture me. No, he will tell morning, sunrise, “start the Surya Namaskar and do it till I come back” and he will go. I thought he is going for one-two-three and coming back, and never to be seen till the sunset. And by the time he comes back, I will feel all My joints are separate – independent intelligence. And if at all I have a possibility just to remove them and drop them separate, separately, I will be really happy. And he will come back and tell – “hey why you stopped 3 minutes in between… in the noon time.” I will ask, “Where were you?” “I was sitting above the rock”… just 50 feet away from Me. And then he will put the gunny bag – that is the joint pain reliever. Nowadays, what do you call? Crepe bandage or whatever. In the village we use gunny bag, that jute, that gunny bag is the….
See in gunny bag, there are varieties. The gunny bag in which the tamarind gets packed and comes, the gunny bag in which the rice gets packed and comes; in the villages, there are a variety of gunny bags where things get packed and come to these wholesale shops. The tamarind gunny bag will be very thick because tamarind will not fall apart. But the rice gunny bag will be very thin and soft because the rice may fall. So, the rice gunny bag will be very thin and soft. That is the crepe bandage. So he will put for both the knees and wherever it is unbearable and tell Me, “Now go and rest”. So I will be lying in the house and using all the bad words I learned from school towards him and then talking to My mother saying, “This fellow, I don’t know what I am going to do doing so much yoga-like this.” And nothing will be plural, or I can’t even tell in the satsang!! It will all be… anyhow. My mother will listen so compassionately. So I will be so happy. abbahhh, from tomorrow, she is not going to send Me back to him. I will be so happy because I will see her having tears in her eyes and trying to do everything possible. In those days, there was no cell phone, only that dial phone… she would dial and talk to somebody and even get the kashayams to relieve pain. And she will make that kashayam and give. I used to think, “oh god, wow…such a wonderful thing”. And just the next day morning at 4.30 – “kannu, swami vanduruchu kannu.” This Means, she will wake Me up by saying, the Guru has come; he is standing down.
nethuthane phone ellam panni, Kasayam ellam panni kodutha
This means that yesterday only you spoke to somebody and made kashayam to relieve the pain.
“No to him, only I spoke.”
She spoke to him only and got the kashayam recipe. Adappavi…
“Sami, sami vanduruchu, enthirichiko time achu” Then she will tell, “No, no, he has come, it is time, get up, get up. Let’s go.”
Absolute innocence and absolute understanding. She is My vatavarana. She was My vatavarana. If she had even one trace of stupidity, this cheap, normal so-called supporting powerlessness as love, that streak, neither I nor you will be here today. It is her – absolute innocence and absolute understanding. Absolute innocence and absolute understanding; provided the vatavarana. Not only she did not have any so-called personal attachment, but she also had the guts to risk My life which no mother would have. All mothers will have the guts to risk their lives. But she is the one who had the guts to risk her life and My life. The vatavarana, the person to whom you crib when you are demanded, matters. What you eat matters, whether it is a hit or ‘shhh….’ If the person you are cribbing pushes you back to the Master and Integrity, it is a hit. Otherwise, it is ‘ssssh…’
Ability to go through this intensity of feeling empowered and feeling overwhelmingly demanded…. understand the life he infuses into Me by that understanding… of Him, and that overwhelmingly demanding by His words to Me… sucking life out of the body and mind.
Sangha, the right sangha is required… so you can crib to the right person and get only hit and not ….. !! Whoever got the right sangha won the game, winning the game. Understand, the person to whom your crib should be highly integrated into Guru… because those moments are decision-making, deciding moments of your life. I would have missed Arunagiri Yogishwara 100 times if My mother was not around Me or Raghupathy Yogi was not around Me Kuppammal was not around Me, and Vibhudananda Puri was not around Me.
Even My grandfather; I need to put it on record. My grandfather do not even know I am sitting with Sadashiva. He only knows I go to some sadhu, sannyasi. Even then he will support Me so much.
We must go to his shop during the vacation and clean all the floor. Then he will give one hand full of jaggery, the traditional jaggery. That is how he trained us to do the physical work. After working one hour, I will get one handful of jaggery. And then, while he was writing the paper, he would say, “Aye, moolaila oru kai pai vachirukane, nee etho oru samiyar kitta poituerukaye, atha avar kitta eduthutu poi koduthuko” means he will tell that corner there is a yellow bag, in that he has kept some jaggery, some rice and all that. He will say, “You are going to some swami na; take that and give it to him.” For Me, only a handful for that swami bagful!!!! Arrey, one hour I cleaned and broomed, for Me only handful, that swami sitting in the temple, he gets bagful But he knows I am highly integrated, I won’t touch anything from his bag. He will add one line – “vera ethavathu venuma antha samikunu ketutu va, nalaiku pombodhu eduthutu po” which means, asks Swami whether he wants anything else and comes back. Tomorrow, when You go back, You take that and go.
Hats off to all who provided vatavarana, and ambiance from Me. The first and foremost responsibility of the sangha is – to provide a space for people to crib and only hit them, not to sh… on them. That is the first and foremost responsibility of the sangha. And have only this kind of integrated people as your sangha; that is sat sangha.
The third important thing is why My Guru-disciple relationship became successful with Arunagiri Yogishwara – I had the patience……. for this intense happening to go on; even when it was overwhelming, I will decide on His side. My Will was always used to be on His side. Last breath, I am going to fall, even if I am going to fall, I will fall on His side, and I was ready to fall on His side and die rather than fall on this side and live. Ultimately, that made it happen. That made it happen.
These three understanding, knowledge – He is more responsible than Me. He is more integrated than Me. He is more authentic than Me. He is more compassionate than Me. His need for Me is much more than My need for Him. His need for Me realizing Oneness is much more than My own need for realizing Me – the oneness experience; I do not know what Oneness is. Only He knows! I do not know what is Oneness, only He knows. So, My need to realize Oneness was much more important for Him than Me
It is not that both of Us know what is romance and we are romanced. I did not even know what romance is, and He taught Me what romance is and that We are romanced!!! So I did not even know what is Oneness and He taught me Oneness, and I had Oneness with Him!!
Understand…. the first sacred secret principle – why I made it – I realized… His commitment towards Me is zillion times more than My commitment towards Him. He is all-compassionate loving, and accepting.
Second, an important thing – vatavarana, ambience. All the persons to whom I cribbed were always integrated and putting Me back to My Guru, not distancing.
Third, tremendous Will Persistence to go through this highly intense process. I may “Ohhh I cannot handle it anymore, it is too much,” but finally, I will fall on this side; on His side, not on this side, the other side. That Will Persistence – If I fall on His side and die that is okay than falling on the other side and even living. This 3 made NITHYANANDA. If any of you want to become that, having these three is the essence of today’s message.
The vatavarana I had when I was with Arunagiri Yogishwara, these four….. Yogananda Puri – Raghupathi Yogi – Preparing My body to go through all the physiological – understand, your nervous system needs to be very strong to go through this empowerment and overwhelmingly demanding. The physical body and nervous system are an absolute requirement to go through this high-energy activity or high, high-power psycho drama – tsunami of guru; you need certain strength in your nervous system and physical and physiological systems. Raghupathi Yogi – Yogananda Puri provided Me with that support.
Vibhudananda Puri provided Me a tremendous understanding of and importance of making it happen.
My grandfather is the funder of funding. He is basically the funding guy for Me. Whatever I want to do, whatever I want to give to My Guru, or whatever I need to get, procure – not too big, big things, all small things. I always had the love that I should give him at least one paduka. So in those days, it cost nine rupees for Me. And I Myself sat with that carpenter and helped him, assisted him and cleaned his patrai and did all the physical labor and supported and did little work along with him and took that paduka and offered at His feet, and he blessed it. Still, we have that paduka; it is there with us. This nine Rupee, I will go and ask My grandfather, he will not ask a second word.
In those days kids are not given so much money. Even though the family is rich, kids will not be given money. Only nowadays, you have all this stupid pocket money, jacket money, and all that. In those days, first of all, the pocket was not there where is pocket money!! And, and villages, they don’t give so much money and all. But he will not ask Me a second word. He will look at the cashier, there will be one cashier who is also his partner; he literally brought him up, and he will look at him. And that fellow will count that 9 rupees for 2 hours. Two hours I have to be standing there. This fellow will rub, rub, rub. See if it is a note you rub and find out whether it is one or two I understand. Coin!!! Nine one rupee coin he will rub, rub, rub almost that coin will lose that 1 rupee sign itself on that coin. And he will rub this side, that side, turn, turn, haa only one, then next one rupee. And I will be standing and ….!!!!
Because I do not know whether my grandfather said yes or no. I requested him, and he was silently writing and only he showed the eyes sign to this cashier fellow and he is arranging. My grandfather had a habit that all these local temples, festivals, and functions anybody comes had that standard thing. For this organization, ten rupees, for this group twenty rupees, for this group seven rupees, like this. So this cashier only will keep that heaps and keep. I do not know whether that fellow is keeping the heap for those groups or he is keeping the heap for Me I don’t know. Only when it reached the number, I said I know, abbahh it is for Me only. The heap is getting collected for me only. Till then, I have to be standing with that anxiety.
That fool…and he will count, count, count. Only when it reaches the nine rupees, the ninth rupee is put on it and he will call My grandfather appa, “appa vechitte.” this means he will tell My grandfather that ‘I have kept it on the table’. Only then I will have a big relief. Abbbaaah it’s for Me only. And never denied, never denied.
I will not ask My father because My father is such a standard, absolutely accessible cashier. If I ask for nine rupees, it will always be fifty rupees. And he will never give any change and all. And he will never ask for a return change. But he is the reserve Brahmastram. If nothing works, if I am not able to see My grandfather, if he is not there, if nothing works, I will touch the Brahmastram. My father is like My reserve cash. So I will not touch him. And he is such Bholenatha. And I tell you…never he will ask for the money back. Even if he tells Me to go and buy something in the shop, he will never take the remaining change.
My grandfather is very clean on accounts and never said no, but he will never give anything extra; and very clear. The word, that principle I learned from him only – ‘We have enough to spend, not a penny to waste.’ ‘We have enough to live, not penny to waste,’ I learned from my grandfather. It’s from him.
So… once that heap is nine rupees by that time, I would have counted that hundred times. By the time this accountant fellow counts and puts that nine rupees, I would have counted a hundred times. Abbaa, it’s for Me only. Then through the eyes, he will sign “aaaa, eduthukoda” which means take it. He will always use the word swami word with very respectful but singular “eduthukoda sami”. Then I will take it and go. He is the funder.
My mother – the absolute innocence. Actually, when she shows compassion when she listens, she is so absolutely innocent, I will not doubt she is not believing me. She is that absolute innocence. An absolute understanding – the next day morning …“Kannu enthiripa polam”. The next day morning, when she tried to wake me up and send me along with my guru, I will not have doubt that yesterday itself she planned this. No! And I will not have a doubt next time when I come and crib, she is not going to listen to me and send me back to him. That is the beauty. Next time I come and crib, I will have the absolute trust she will not send me back to him again. No, somehow, she was able to give me the courage and absolute innocence. And never supported my powerlessness with her absolute understanding. If I have to describe my mother in these two words, I will describe her as… the introduction to her is these 2 words. Of course, when I write my autobiography, these two words will be the heading of the chapter when I describe her – Absolute Innocence and Absolute Understanding. Anybody who has lived with her, can understand these 2 words are description words for her.
The vatavarana I was provided, I tell you, if not for the vatavarana, ambiance, there is 99% chance I would have failed. I tell you, in these three, the other two reasons, I’ll only give one percent. Vatavarana is 99%. Because when you are getting solidified, when the plant is sprouting, it is the fence, the vatavarana is 99% more important than anything else. I tell you, this Sangha will provide you vatavarana. Be here for Sadāshivatva. Fortunately, I had the vatavarana, but in the modern world, unfortunately, it’s almost impossible to have that same vatavarana. I am creating that vatavarana, in a systematic, scientific way in this Sangha. If you want to make it, be here in Bengaluru Aadheenam. THIS IS THE VATAVARANA. If your vatavarana, ambiance, is not missed, I guarantee you will make it, you will make it, you will make it.
It is the person to whom you crib, the vatavarana – that destroys. The 99% of the destruction is not having vatavarana, the right Sangha, Satsangha, the right company, and the right ambiance. If you made it into Bengaluru Aadheenam, you have made it. Take this as my word. If you made it here, you made it there. If you made it to the flight, you made it to the place you were supposed to reach because the pilot was very experienced.
I have a question being projected – “When Swamiji shared about being in your physical presence, many in branch ashrams may think that they are not in your physical presence, can Swamiji clarify that?” You may all be thinking,” I’ll say no, no, no, My branch ashrams are My physical presence, that is okay.” No! A simple clear-cut NO! Because this jump, THIS INTENSE PRESENCE, NEEDS TWO PHYSICAL BODIES TO BE TOGETHER, THAT IS THE REASON I ASSUMED THE PHYSICAL BODY. This transmission is physical, not just psychological. If it is just psychological, I would not have assumed the physical body. I’ll be sitting in Kailasa, just giving you darshan and doing the whole thing. No! Clear-cut NO! It is physical – Bidadi Aadheenam, Bengaluru Aadheenam.
Consolations are different, counseling is different, and Truth is completely different. Here, I have to be truthful; not counseling or consoling. No! It’s absolute. Understand this… illogically, mind-blowing, empowering love and illogically, mind-tearing, overwhelming demand…. for you to go through that and make it happen, both bodies need to be physically in one breathing space.
Otherwise, Arunagiri Yogishwara need not assume a physical body. He assumed a physical body. I want this on record not light body, tejomaya sarira, divya sarira – physical body! It was physical. I have touched it, felt it, played with it. It was physical; because this whole high intense process cannot happen just psychological. Sadāshivatva is not just all about psychological. Videha Mukti is all about psychological and conscious, but Sadāshivatva is not just all about psychological and consciousness, it is physical, physiological, psychological, and conscious. There are physical and physiological components involved in it. So don’t ask Me consolation. I am not shutting the door on anybody, but I cannot be giving consolations when it comes to truth; because I am responsible for what I am talking. I am responsible for what I am talking about.
That is why, even though I wanted to get apartments outside to stay, Kalabhairava is not letting it happen. Tons of stay is always available, and I wonder what is going on. And here I am doing everything, and there He is doing, “hmmmm……hmmmm” [Swamiji making faces] Because He is more concerned and He is more integrated, for you guys making it, than Me. Till constructing, I wanted to make the people stay, even for that He is not letting anything happen. It is as if almost happened, almost happened…. that’s all… not happened!! Make it, if you want to make it.
